football


people. what is it about people, some people you just 'click' with, other's? well, to steal the word's of an old workmate, the legendary albert 'one-egg', when i was working away from home as an apprentice pipe fitter/welder, albert, although not a tradesman, was recognised as probably one of the best pipefitter's mates in the business, he sort of took me, the callow young lad, under his wing and taught me the way's of the world, i was fifteen years old, i started my apprentiship and on the very first day was sent to lodge away from home, bloody hell, what a shock, i'd just left school and here i was, catching a train to a far off town to start work, not to return home after my shift, but to live with my contemporaries, the first night, sharing a room above a pub with four strangers, i just wanted to die, i felt so miserable and hardly slept a wink, the heavy snoring and farting, muttered, dream induced oath's and snatches of conversation, i guess i truly cried my self to sleep that night, albert was there for me, he must have been about the age that i am now, in his mid fifties, he woke me up that morning and after a quick wash we went downstairs for breakfast, a 'full english', fried breakfast with all the trimmings, the old bird serving up the fare must have had a soft spot for albert, 'two egg's albert?' 'no thank's darling, just the one egg for me' said albert, giving me a broad wink, suddenly it clicked about the 'one egg' nickname, albert helped me to become one of the gang, it was him who cut me down from the site cabin door when the rest of the lads nailed me to it through my heavy blue cotton boiler suit, he taught me how to play koum kan, a favourite card game amongst construction workers and introduced me to the 'edge' western paperback's, when the lads went out on the piss, albert would stop with me in the digs and we would just read our books or have a game of cards, i grew up quickly, passed my apprentiship and moved firms when my request for a few bob more on my hourly rate was turned down, i remember telling albert i was leaving, i can remember his response to this day, 'leaving? you'll never make it while you've got a hole in yer arse youth! keep yer tongue out and yer bowels open, good luck boy, you'll fucking need it!' like i said, people. on the other hand, there are people who to quote old 'one egg' again, 'i wouldn't piss on 'em if they were on fire' football today, derby vs wolves, wolverhampton wanderers were relegated from the premier league last season and if their performance today is anything to go by, could drop into the next division, they started the day fourth from bottom and after probably the worst game of the season i've seen, the two teams went home with a point each.....

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  1. You're a one-off Lovey, great yarn . . . when I was sent to boarding school as a thirteen year old beginning high school, I bawled myself to sleep on the first night . . . by the third day, I phoned mum and dad and told them not to bother coming up to see me on the weekend. X

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  2. Great tale, yeah the 'older' guys. Remember a guy that took some of us under his wing when I was working at a summer resort at Lake Tahoe. We were 18 he was probably late 20's, but he was the 'old man'. He'd buy us beer, in a futile attempt to keep us from smokin' 'dope'.Nailed to a door, oh man. Construction workers sound like they are the same everywhere. A friend of mine got sealed up in a big pipe he was welding in, Had to cut his way out.

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  3. when i think back to some of the stunt's that got pulled back in the day, we would all be doing time for it nowdays! some of the lads on site used to spike a particularly nasty chargehands tea with laxatives, poor bloke nearly had a nervous breakdown in the end, then there was the time that us apprentices drilled the coddy's mug, dropped a anti-vibe rubber under it and srewed it to the table in the site cabin, his mug full of tea, he nearly ripped the handle off trying to pick up his mug and chased us all around the site, another time we were cheeking a big labourer on the site, safe in the knowledge that he couldn't get at us as we were securely locked in the van, imagine our suprise when after returning to the yard, the labourer suddenly appeared, he had ridden on the passenger step of the van and proceeded to fill in one of the apprentices, who shall we say, was a little on the 'portly' side and couldn't run as fast as the rest of us! happy day's......

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