I'm a stranger here

BayFest 2013 today, Anna Maria Island, saw the adverts for this last weekend and decided to have a nose-bag, parking wasn't a problem if you didn't mind walking a couple of hundred yards, no problem for us poor English people, we have to walk everywhere, mostly barefoot, (unless you can find a couple of slices of old stale bread to duct-tape to your feet as we can't afford shoes), but, something which our host's seem to struggle with for some reason, anyhoo, BayFest, they close off the Main Street and you are free to wander, artisan stalls selling everything from hippy-chic jewellery, art and paintings, street food, t-shirts and the ever present time share realty stall, 'hi folk's! We have lots of freebies today, we just need you to spend half your vacation drinking cheap piss sparkling wine and listening to our sales spiel while we batter you into submission' (ok, the opening statement is real, the latter part is me slipping into cynicism) I push my Oakleys up onto my fat, red, forehead, look her square in the eye and tell her 'I'm sorry, I don't like it here, why would I want to buy a house here?' She's literally stunned, she doesn't know what to say, result! Mrs B says I'm rude, I don't think I am, I mean, I didn't start it,I didn't wander up to her and tell her what I was going to do to the Bonneville or the Ducati over winter, I just want to wander around and soak it all up, listen to the bands on stage, look at the classic cars, (here's a few, I'm saving the best) and spend time with my family, not listening to some English ex-pat trying to sell me stuff, fuck off to Benidorm love, you might not get 'insulted' over there.
Anna Maria Island is a charming place, pastel coloured, seaside houses, a Bohemian vibe, sea shells and flip-flops, sunshine and Tiki bars, palm trees and the slight waft of coconut oil and patchouli in the air, a heady concoction, just another shitty day in Paradise I guess, if you dig just a little deeper you get the true picture, I always pick up a local newspaper on my travels, forget the tourist information hand-out's, the local press is where it's at, the Anna Maria Island 'Sun' (please excuse Brit's guffawing loudly here, 'The Sun' National paper is a turgid piece of shit in 'our' country) the Anna Maria Sun has correspondence from the locals about tourists parking on the Island, excuse me? Your economy is almost 100 percent based on income generated by tourists who want to experience the beauty of the Gulf Coast and you are bitching and moaning about visitors? I'm sorry but that doesn't quite add up, do the math, I also picked up the local Bradenton Herald paper, front page? 'Island Auto may have to move off AMI' after forty years the Rickerson family business are being forced out of their premises, why? Well, the lease will not be renewed even though they have offered to pay double the monthly rent, with property value soaring and the value of the garage being close to a million dollars, ummm, let me think about this one, fight the power Island Auto, You gotta fight the power that be......

Location:Gulf Drive